Are you a male, female of any age, race, color, creed, orientation? Have you spent years in therapy with no closure in sight? Does everything offend you? Do you believe in Freedom of Speech while working overtime to squash any Conservative opinion what so ever?
If you answered 'yes' to just one of these questions we have a career opportunity for you!
WELCOME TO OBATRON INDUSTRIES!
We at OBATRON INDUSTRIES have a long seventy-five year history of tainting American history to suit the political needs of Liberals. We are looking for talented individuals with extensive experience in the fields of:
: Years spent at Liberal Colleges on public money.
: Associations with known Community Organizations.
: Election rigging.
: Planned Parenthood Volunteer.
: Greenpeace Volunteer.
: La Raza Volunteer.
: Protestor at any WTO meeting (especially if you have experience in destruction of private property or assaulting Police Officers).
Are you proficient in?
: Editting video to send a skewed message?
: Hacking into FOX News websites?
: Shouting down Conservative speakers at rallies?
: Forcing others to bend to your will for fear of an ACLU Lawsuit?
: Slandering some one as a racist with no, actual proof?
Then a career at OBATRON INDUSTRIES just may be the exact career you have been searching for!
Our clean, OSHA inspected, overly regulated, highly taxed (though we find ways to hide our earnings), Politically Correct, Handicap Accessible, gender neutral and allergy free factory is the envy of the Nationalized Industrial World! We spend more time on safety, "feel good" meetings and "sensitivity" training than we do actually getting anything produced on the factory floor. Our personnel have never filed a lawsuit against us because their lawyers are our lawyers!
Your potential earnings could be in the billions! It all depends on how little you want to work and how much you can siphon from some one else. We have a totally free Healthcare package paid for by our competition (the free market). Our retirement package includes a bailout derivative when your 401K goes down the toilet. All the vacations you want and thirty minute breaks for every fifteen minutes worked (As per SEIU Regs).
You most likely will be asked to take a pay cut or advance in position as more "undocumented workers" show up, un-announced at our factory looking for work. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer as long as you are undocumented, a minority, female, transgendered, and-or gay/lesbian/bi. White, heterosexual males will be considered on an "as needed" basis but must undergo an extensive CORI and criminal backround check, provide a blood sample and proof of political affiliation.
So click the link below to not fill out your application. No SS# or proof of citizenship required!
Thank you for applying to OBATRON INDUSTRIES!!